How To Tell If You're Too Close To Wyoming Wildlife

How close is too close when you're viewing wildlife?

You really have no idea how fast an animal can run until you see it run.

Grizzly bears are big, but they can run a lot faster than you think.

Is a safe distance 15 feet away? 75 yards away? 63 miles away?

Here's some weird advice for keeping a safe distance from wildlife- that just might work.

Hold up your thumb at arm's length.

Does your thumb cover the entire animal in question?

If you answered yes, then you're far enough away.

If you can still see the animal around the sides of your thumb, then you are too close.

If the animal bites off your thumb or arm, you are too close. Just saying.

This general rule works with any animal, but also muggers in the big city.

Women can use this against creepy-looking guys at bars.

This guidance from the Leave No Trace campaign can keep you safe from being in the next video of a visitor getting tossed, mauled, trampled, skewered, bitten, or digested by wildlife. You do not want that to be your 15 minutes of fame. (DNM).

The photos below were posted on the Facebook page of Dinosaur National Monument.

This person is NOT hitchhiking. This is a demonstration of how to measure a safe distance.

The second photo is obviously Photoshop. But it gives you an idea of what "too close looks like.

HINT: If you can smell the bear's breath, and maybe even feel it, it's too late.

Now all we need is to know the distance you need between you, your friend, and the animal in question.

Always put your "friend" between you and a dangerous animal. You'll have a better chance of escape.

But what if you end up too close anyway and you have to fight?

Here is a handy guide on how to outsmart a bear.

I was looking for videos that might offer the worst advice - EVER - on how to survive a bear attack.

WOW did I find a DOOZY!

You can watch the video below.

You'll want to stick with the video because the more you watch the more bizarre it gets.

Honestly, the first few minutes I was thinking, 'Gee this looks like great advice.'

THEN IT GOT WEIRD!

That statement above is SO TRUE!

You can literally use anything you can think of and nobody is going to call you out for bad sportsmanship.

Just be warned that bears understand this too.

So expect the bear to fight dirty.

The good news is that you'll probably be able to think of more clever ideas on how to fight dirty than the bears. Unless you're frozen in panic, then the bear has the advantage.

Step 2 is actually good advice. Don't run. Bears love to chase things kind of like cats does.

But I'm not so sure about this next step.

You'll just have to see what I mean by watching the video.

You can try to freak out the bear with puzzles and quizzes but most bears are pretty good at that kind of stuff.

DO NOT engage the bear in a game of Trivial Pursuit. You'll lose.

I'm betting I can beat a bear at chess. But maybe not checkers.

Step 11 only works if you have some back knowledge of the bear's personal life.

I'm not sure I'd go here because I don't know too many bears personally.

Then again you'd have to ask what the bear might know about you.

What if the bear has some dirt on you that outdoes the dirt you have on him?

NOW WHAT?

If all this seems odd, wait till you watch the video. It does not end the way you think.