Why Eating Holiday Junk Food Is Good For You

It's hard to resist all those holiday treats, isn't it?

And you're probably already thinking of those New Year resolutions to lose weight.

Well, just so you know, junk food is part of a healthy diet.

You know it's true because you just read it on the internet, and EVERYTHING on the internet is true, right?

PERFECT - so lets talk about the health benefits of junk food.

Yesterday I had a salad, then after I had some cookies.

See the balance there?

Healthy greens along with sugar junk add up to a zero-sum game.

It's like that Pink Floyd song where the school teacher yells at the kids,

How can you have your pudding if you don't eat your meat?

So what you need to do is simply make sure that you eat something good for you along with that healthy food.

People who eat nothing but healthy food usually die young.

Don't ask me why.

They just do.

I know it's true because I read it on the internet.

So if someone sees you taking a few extra treats this holiday just tell them that you're going to balance that with something really good for you later in the day.

Maybe you could tell them that you've already had something healthy and you are balancing your diet now.

The usual response that I get is laughter, then they indulge in that junk food right along with me.

It must be true if we are all doing it, right?

For the record, I am not a doctor.

ACTUALLY -- My doctor told me that I was wrong about all of this.

But he told me I was wrong while having cookies with me.