Space Aliens Abduct Wyoming Grizzly – Probing Ends In Disaster
If you think it's bad when a human tourist tries to pet and talk a selfie with a grizzly, imagine what would happen if some aliens in a spaceship tried to beam one up --- then probe it.
Did you ever stop for a moment and wonder;
Do space aliens only abduct humans?
Are we the only species aliens choose to probe and chip?
With a planet so full of life, you better believe we humans are not the only ones that space aliens are curious about.
I'm sure you are also aware of all the bear vs. human mishaps that happen at Yellowstone each year.
Humans that are not used to being around wild animals like bears think that they can pet them and talk selfies. It never ends well.
Recently some space aliens were crisscrossing Yellowstone national park, in Wyoming, to try and find one of those big fuzzy Earth creatures they had heard so much about.
First, they picked up a hairy tourist, realized it was just some guy named Gary, from New York, and plopped him back down by his family. They fled Wyoming doing 102 miles per hour and did not slow down until they arrived home in the Bronx, where they were mugged.
But let's get back to Yellowstone.
Having then spotted a big hairy thing walking on all fours Commander Fzperrupkin and his first officer Doug decided this creature was a prime candidate.
So, they beamed it up.
The bear was shocked enough to find itself suddenly standing in a small room when he was just outside a moment ago. This upset him.
The aliens tried the regular tranquilizers and force beams, but nothing was quite holding the beast still.
Then, Ensign Lingilwomp tried sticking a probe up the bear's butt.
Ensign Lingilwomp's last words were recorded as being, "I really don't think this is a good idea." But orders are orders - so.
It's hard to describe what happened next.
Best we can describe it is to say that there was a lot of erratic maneuvering up in the sky by the UFO. Then, suddenly, the bear found itself on the ground again.
The spaceship was last seen traveling at warp 102 back to Andromeda.
I SWEAR this is a true story. Scouts honor and stuff.