What The Onion Said About Wyoming Is Truly Bizarre

Just before the end of 2023, The Onion published a state-by-state list of the Most Popular New Year's Resolutions.

So, I skipped right to the end of the list.

Wyoming is always last, of course.

I was not sure what to expect.

What would you think they would write, especially when you consider that The Onion is known for satirical articles, nothing is even close to being true.

Here is what they came up with for Wyoming's New Year resolutions:

Consummate Relationship with Tumnleweed

Right... well then.

Not sure what The Onion thinks is going on in this state, but they are actually not too far off.

Here in Wyoming tumbleweeds are always just wandering by and we never stop them to say hello or ask them where they are going.

Care to go back to Russia, where you came from?

Do you miss your homeland?

After reading Wyoming's resolution I figured I'd check out the states around us.

Once again, funny, and not too far off from reality.

Colorado

 Find way down mountain

South Dakota

 Part Ways With Toxic Horse.

Montana

 Run Head First Into Buffalo For Science.

Utah

 Decorate Bunker.

I'm sure they could have been a lot harder on us all.

But then again, The Onion is written by people who could never get a real job due to their weird imaginations.

These were the loser geeks in school that nobody paid attention to.

Now we can't wait to hear what they have to say.